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Talking
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Three Questions
As an Englishman working and living in Lahti, I am often asked the following questions (usually by drunks). (1) What brought you to Finland; was it a woman? (2) Do you like football? (3) Do you like Finnish beer?
The first time I stepped on Finnish soil was way back in 1988 when I was inter railing. After visiting a friend of my parents in Oslo, I travelled to Stockholm to visit Martin Enholm, an athletic rival of mine and at the time the top ranked 800 metres runner in Northern Europe. Examining my inter rail ticket, Martin enquired, if I realised that I could travel on the ferry to Finland for free? I responded by asking where is Finland? The following day, after studying a map, I set sail for a glorious week in Turku before travelling to Helsinki and then back to Stockholm.
Some eight years later, I was lucky enough to participate in a student exchange programme at Tampere University of Technology. Unable to secure full-time employment in Finland, upon graduation, I returned to England where I studied for a TESOL (Teaching English to Speakers of Other Languages) qualification, before moving to Finland as a freelance English language teacher. At the time, I did not have a Finnish girlfriend, but have been dating a wonderful lady for the past three years and we are both very happy, at least I am…..
Like most red blooded English males, I am a football fan. Unfortunately, I support Leeds United, the footballing equivalent of the Titanic. Six years ago they were in the Champions League semi-final. Now they are floundering in the third tier of English football and burdened by debts of £35 million. On the bright side, during the 1970s Leeds were a major force in English and European football and regularly appeared on Finnish television. This means that there is a small army of Leeds fans in Lahti who are always willing to discuss the good times with me, especially when drunk!
To be honest, I don’t like Finnish beer. Please don’t take offence, I am not especially fond of English beer either. In general, I find beer far too gassy. However, after sports and when taking a sauna, I really find a pint of shandy hits the spot, and is truly refreshing. Unfortunately, ordering said drink in Finland is not without its difficulties. Shandy, half beer and half lemonade in the same glass is a very popular drink in England, especially with drivers! I have yet to meet a Finn who drinks shandy, and I am usually met with a blank stare when ordering a shandy in Finland. Explaining that it is half beer and half lemonade only adds to the confusion. In England, lemonade is the name given to a drink made from lemon juice or synthetic substitute, for example, 7UP or Sprite. The term soft drink, which corresponds to the Finnish word ‘limonadi’, is used when talking about a range of non-alcoholic drinks and includes lemonade, Coca-Cola, and even orange juice. The last time I ordered a shandy, in Sante-Fe, I was served beer with ginger ale!
When drinking for pleasure and not refreshment, my favourite alcoholic beverage is Guinness a stout. Once again, ordering a stout is not so straightforward in Finland. Stout is not a dark beer. So what is it? Beer is the general name given to alcoholic drinks brewed with yeast and hops. They can be divided into two distinct groups - top fermenting and bottom fermenting. Top fermenting beers include wheat beers, stouts, porters and ales. As the name suggests the fermentation takes place at the top of the barrel, and at room temperature. At just two days the brewing process is very quick and the yeast is used to create the many different and unique tastes.
To state the obvious, in bottom fermenting beers the fermentation takes place at the bottom. However, this time the yeast is only used to create alcohol and has no affect on the taste. Bottom fermented beers include all lager types and dark beers such as Koff Velvet and Velkopopviky.
In case anyone is on a diet, Guinness actually contains less calories than a typical lager beer. Finally, should anyone want to buy me a stout, I can be found in Metro Pub most Saturday evenings where, at the last count, they had six different stouts!
Mike Bangle is the owner of Talking English language consultancy and can be contacted at mike.bangle(at)phnet.fi
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