 |
|
Talking
English
Your Passport to Better Language Communication |
|
|
|
|
|
|
The Wrong Kind of Snow
For me, November is generally the worst month of the year. The nights start to get (much) longer and (much) darker - and the first real snow has yet to fall. But, when is snow, not snow, or the wrong kind of snow?
I once heard a story about a Finnish company who signed a very lucrative contract with the Canadian government to supply four ‘snow throwers’. On their first day in service the engine of each and every one of them overheated and blew up. Why did this happen? And why was it not anticipated in advance? In Finland, the snow is very soft and light, like ‘powder’. In common with English snow; Canadian snow is heavier due to a much higher moisture content. Their motors simply were unable to cope with this extra weight. The Finnish company paid the ultimate price for this oversight and went bankrupt.
It is not only Finnish engineers who have a problem with snow machines. Every time it snows in England most of the trains are cancelled. On one particular occasion, an unfortunate British Rail (BR) employee had been dragged into a TV studio. “Why does this happen every year?” he was asked. “And why, in particular, did it happen this year when you have just spent a frighteningly large amount of money on new state of the art Norwegian snow clearing equipment?” The poor bureaucrat gained immortality for himself by explaining that the Norwegian snow clearing equipment had not helped because it was “for the wrong kind of snow.”
As ludicrous as this explanation sounds, it is actually true. In Norway the soft powdery snow simply blows off the train engines. In England, the heavy and wet snow seeps between the tiniest of cracks in the engine casing and short circuits the electronics.
As an Englishman living in Finland I have also misjudged Finnish snow. After enjoying a sauna, some friends of mine ran out and started to roll in the fresh snow. Prepared to try anything once, I tried, and quite enjoyed it. The next time I had a sauna with some different friends, after a couple of beers I decided to show them how ‘Finnish’ I was. I ran out and jumped into the snow. Unfortunately, the snow was by now more than a week old. I won’t be doing that again in a hurry!
As an enthusiastic athlete, I have only ever raced (run) in the snow once. It was a surreal experience at a cross-country event in Worthing near Brighton on the south coast of England. The sun was shining brightly and the snow was so heavy that it was like running in thick mud. After the first of two laps, for the first and only time in my life, I was forced to drop out of a race. The reflection of the sun in the snow had given me the worst migraine headache I have ever had the misfortune to experience. Thankfully, I have never experienced such a headache when skiing in Finland. Could it be that the sun does not shine during the long Finnish winter? I will let you decide.
Mike Bangle is the owner of Talking English language consultancy and can be contacted at mike.bangle(at)phnet.fi
Word List
|
|
|
|